24. Part 2 - स्वधर्मे निधनं श्रॆयः परधर्मो भयावहः

<< Previous - Part 1 - The Ascent

It was evident that spirituality and the ultimate questions such as ‘Who Am I’ will be more likely pursued by the people if they are first happy and content with respect to the basic needs of the material world – food, shelter, health and family. If these are not met fully, then time and effort of such people would only be spent on achieving these. So material contentment was noticed to be the essential step before someone would move into spirituality. It was necessary (Preyas) but not sufficient (Refer The Upturned Priorities).

In the early days of the civilization, before the Varna system was clearly defined, several problems were encountered and resolved. For e.g. when surveys were conducted by the administrators, they saw that some of the people, even after having sufficient money, were still greedy for more money. For some reason they were not content and were trying to pile up more and more money. So a question arose – how to make someone feel sufficient with respect to the material needs? After several discussions and surveys, psychiatrists submitted  a detailed report to the administrators. Their report, in brief was as follows:

Some people, for various reasons (such as enforced into father’s profession), had opted to work in a profession which was not the area of their expertise and talent. This had settled as a deep discontentment in their hearts. Although they had forgotten about it and buried it deep in them, without their knowledge it had grown into a big tree of hidden stress. Without knowing the actual reason for their own mental unrest, they were all trying to quench the restlessness with more money and other things. But when they got more money, obviously it wasn’t able to satisfy their hidden desire for job satisfaction. So when money was unable to satisfy them, they grew more restless. And they again tried to quench it with more money. So, more the money they had, the more restless they became. This had grown into a vicious vortex.

As a remedy, it was decided to regulate Varna system very strictly. Swadharma (Profession adopted as per inherent talent alone) was given the utmost importance. A dancer should only become a dancer, a person with sharp mathematical abilities should only become an engineer, a person with excellent fitness, courage and adventurous attitude should only become a soldier etc. No profession, on its own, was considered cheaper than others. It was considered cheap only if somebody was pursuing it out of compulsion of family, money etc. Following Paradharma (Profession adopted not as per inherent talents) was considered very disgraceful. Even Krishna says this in the Gita – it is better to follow Swadharma, even if there are mistakes, rather than following Paradharma meticulously and perfectly. It is better to die performing Swadharma rather than living in fear with Paradharma (Gita 3.35). Saraswati civilization promptly noticed that following Swadharma resolved and dissolved the vicious vortex of greed and all the negativity associated with it. When people did what they were born to do, when they did what they loved from their heart, money didn’t matter anymore. They were very content with whatever money they got. Because now they were more happy in seeing somebody’s need getting fulfilled because of their talent and expertise. They took more delight in seeing themselves filling a crucial place in the jigsaw of the society. That happiness beat all other material happiness.

Gurukulas were given the duty of identifying the potential of a child and helping him or her develop that particular talent. It became apparent to them that the whole world is working as a gigantic system, like a machine. And in a machine, there cannot be unnecessary parts. Each part fulfills a purpose. A small spring is as important as a big lever. The machine will fail even if that tiny spring fails. So, no part is superior to others, all are equally important for the machine to work. There are no optional parts in a machine. Similarly, they understood that each child potentially had something specific to offer to the society. Each person was meant to fulfill a purpose in the machine of the world. They understood the beauty of diversity of the creation. Creation consisted of both the needs of the people and the people who could fulfill those needs. So, the whole society complemented each other and lived as one family. The jigsaw of the society was matching so perfectly, that they wondered at the genius of the creator, if any!

This way, everyone was strictly monitored from childhood and promoted to ensue his or her inherent talents. Following Swadharma worked wonders. As everyone was loving what they were doing, the assigned duty of a person became so effortless to him/her that mind would be mostly free and relaxed even during the activity (in the current age we opt for Paradharma and we cannot relax even after our work!). For e.g. a born singer would not have to put special efforts to sing. Only a little training, a little effort would suffice. After that he only enjoys singing, and hardly suffers fatigue. Perhaps only when the tones are very difficult, he may have to put some effort to sing correctly. This way everyone was enjoying their assigned work which required only a minimum effort on their part. A actor would effortlessly act, a cook would effortlessly cook and so on. This ensured that stress (Aadhi – imbalance in the mental realm) was extricated from the roots. And consequently Vyadhi (imbalance in the physical realm) was also very rare.

When people were thus content materialistically – money, health, family and Swadharma – automatically their minds were drawn towards deeper questions and quests. Since they were rid of all the challenges of the world, their relaxed mind automatically asked “What Am I doing here?”, “What is the purpose of life” etc. The Brahmana sect would then guide them systematically, step by step, towards answering these questions and finding the ultimate reality. This was what Brahmanas were born to do – preach Adhyatma to the spiritually thirsty along with performing Yajnas and boosting positivity in the society. Or rather people who were born to do this were called Brahmanas. Only those who were, by birth, interested in Adhyatma, only those who, by birth, displayed inclination towards Self-Enquiry were called Brahmanas. The Brahmana sect lived on Dana alone. They were not supposed to demand anything nor complain if at all nothing was given. A Brahmana’s son need not be a Brahmana. A Kshatriya’s son need not be a Kshatriya. Same as how today an engineer’s son need not be an engineer. It solely depends on the interest of the child. Although the possibilities that a child will show similar interests as his/her parents is more, that was never the criteria for deciding his Varna and Swadharma.

King Bharata, as per Mahabharata, did not consider any of his sons to be eligible for the throne and he selected a young boy from a Gurukula to succeed him. Indians can be proud that our country is named after such a selfless great King who lived for Swadharma and put it into practice, even if it meant that his own sons were denied Kingship. And we should also be proud of his sons who accepted that it was not their Swadharma to rule a country.

And thus, Varna system and Swadharma were also made a part of the Karma Kanda of the Vedas. So, in summary, Karma Kanda basically had three aspects.

• Scientific rituals to promote harmony between man and nature
• Dana - Sacrifice to promote harmony between man and man
• Varna - Swadharma to promote harmony between man and his own Self

So, an important message of our scriptures is Swadharma. It would probably require a brave step from many of us to shift into our Swadharma, as most of us are caught in the web of money, loan etc. But if it is feasible, it is better to shift to a field of our interest. If not, well, we can keep a target and then shift after few years. We are already seeing this happening in our current generation to a certain extent which is a good sign. But sometimes, even if we are in our Swadharma, we may be overworking so as to get more money with the hope of getting peace with it. Well, with common sense, we can say that, overworked Swadharma for the sake of money, and not for the sake of satisfaction, would also become Paradharma. If it is extra load, our mind will not be set in the work, but will be working only for the sake of money. And that will be as good as an imposed work - which becomes Paradharma.

The second indirect message that we can grasp is that we should learn to see and appreciate the harmony of the system as a whole and treat all professions with equal respect. A small assignment – the next time you go in an Auto Rickshaw, even if the driver tries to cheat you, keep in mind that he is an integral part of the system. The cheating – quarrelling has gone into a vicious vortex. The driver will think “These people earn lakhs every month. Why can’t they give me 20 rupees more?” and you will think “These drivers are all rascals. They are after my money”. In the process both fail to notice the wonderful harmony of the system. Can we imagine a city without the service of the auto drivers available? Can the auto drivers imagine a city where nobody takes their service? Money is only a transaction entity. Why can’t we think “Auto drivers are so hard working and provide such convenient service to the society. They drive the whole day in dust and smoke of the city for people like us. I waste so much money on junk food and dress. Let him take a little extra, so what?”. Can we even imagine driving in the city whole day as a driver? Why can’t we thank a driver with love for helping us reach our home safely and conveniently, rather than cursing him and disturbing ourselves as well? What is more important? 50 Rupees? Or our peace? Instead of succumbing to the vicious vortex, we can try to break it. You just try once saying to the driver "Is it enough? Or do you want more", with affection, just as how you would ask your friend. And then see his reaction. Of course, there may be some really rude drivers, and let us ignore them. I am talking about a general scenario and majority will not be rude. We argue because we think that the saved 30-40 rupees will give us more peace and happiness. In fact, by saving 50 Rupees by shouting and quarrelling, we cause more harm to our mind and body! And then, the same we, will lavishly spend thousands in a mall for some unneeded item which will sometimes be kept unpacked in some corner of our house for years!

You may ask what this has to do with Self-Enquiry. Well, I started noticing that these small things in our daily activities disturb us very frequently, like a constant and unnecessary low voltage in the system. Self-Enquiry will initially happen only if there is peace and contentment in the mind. And when I got rid of such petty distractions, it greatly helped. So, I believe, it is better to lose money and be peaceful, rather than save 20 Rupees and be disturbed!

23. Part 1 - The Ascent

<< Previous - Bed Time Stories

From bits and pieces of information that flowed from different people and books, I have written a story below. This story will show that self-enquiry is not dry, but will lead to such colorful stories ;) Self-enquiry sometimes gets diverted into big-time dreaming! And this is what we can munch before going to bed ;)

Just a few details before we go into the story. A river named Saraswati is mentioned at several places in the Vedas and some Puranas. Rigveda goes to the extent of saying "Saraswati is the best river, best mother and best Goddess". It has mention of people crossing this river in ships - such big was this river. There were supposed to have been battles that took place between the people living on either banks of this huge river. Where was this river and where is it now? Indians blindly believed the stupid Aryan invasion theory written by a westerner, and put it even in school text books. It is only recently that some real fact-finding research has been undertaken (and real facts of older researches have been revealed) and the glory of ancient India is coming to light.

Satellite images have revealed that a huge river still flows several miles underneath Rajasthan. And there are sufficient evidences now to know that it is the river Saraswati. A book was published in 2010 "The Lost River: On the Trail of the Saraswati" giving details of the research findings. Saraswati was flowing majestically once upon a time, in today's Rajasthan desert, and nourished its children for several millennia towards the immortal knowledge - the knowledge of the Self.
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Thousands of years ago, on the banks of river Saraswati, a civilization flourished and reached the pinnacles of glory. Their science was developed so much that they could even travel to different worlds and communicate with extra terrestrials. Today, science means going to a lab and doing an experiment. No doubt, this is one way of scientific development. But this is not the only way of scientific development. The Saraswati civilization had developed science in their own way and were quite advanced in technology. The secret behind their success was its sustainability – unlike today’s science which only sucks and slowly drains nature, their science was in tune with nature and harnessed all the potentials of nature without disturbing the balance of ecosystem. That is why the civilization could sustain for a few thousand years without any sort of disruption.

They had discovered Surya Vijnana (the science of the Sun) which deals with subtle cosmic rays. They found two primary types of rays – Solar and Lunar. They are not to be understood as merely sun rays and moon rays. They were not the normal electromagnetic rays of light. The rays belonged to a subtler realm and the names given – Solar and Lunar - were based on the characteristics of these subtle rays. Same as how you give title names to a person based on his characteristics. Then they found permutations and combinations of these two rays giving rise to several different types of rays. Same as how electron, proton, neutron permuted differently give rise to different elements. All physical objects and manifestations, they found to be made up of combinations of these rays.

Each manifestation at physical level has a corresponding ray-signature at subtle level. For e.g. water has a particular ray-signature, dryness another signature etc. Each living entity – human, animal, plants etc – all have specific energy signatures of their own. And within one species, again there will be variation in energy signatures. For e.g. rose plant will have a different energy signature than a banyan tree. They found that fire can be used as a medium to manipulate the energy signature of the surrounding environment as a whole. They did experiments after experiments and found what plants, what type of oils can manipulate water content in the atmosphere and produce rain. These plants and oils were burnt in fire and consequently a particular energy signature would become rich in that region. This will slowly manifest in the physical world as rain. Rain was the primary focus, but not the only energy signature that they learnt to manipulate. They had learnt to regulate all of nature’s forces through different types of Yajnas.

You may ask “What is the need to regulate nature? Will it not work perfectly if left alone?”. Well, yes. Plant and animal kingdoms are programmed and they live almost without choice. So, they do not harm nature and the nature-regulation will evolve very slowly over thousands of years. But human beings got the power of intellect and free choice. Currently our generation is using the intellect to disturb the balance of nature and degrade the evolution and regulation of nature. So, that makes up two possibilities – maintain as it is (animals and plants) and inhibition (current civilization). Then why can’t the third possibility be explored? Why can’t human beings, with their intellect, catalyze the regulation of nature and make it evolve towards perfection faster? That is what Saraswati civilization tried to do. They tried to make nature more beautiful and well regulated through their efforts. Because finally it is only going to help the inhabitants in their struggle towards perfection. Their science was more of common sense than complicated logic.

This way they had used science and common sense to make a better living in harmony with nature. Then they found that regulating the nature alone was insufficient to make them feel secure and self-assured. Something was missing. They realized that if people constrict themselves into smaller groups, they invariably get to face extremes of good and bad. Whereas if the group is big and the whole society lives as one family, complementing each other in all the needs and difficulties, then the fluctuation of fate reduced. Thus, they added ‘Dana’ to all the vaidika karmas that they performed. If some needy are not given money, food etc then the vaidika karma was not considered complete. It was made a mandatory part (Refer Rationale Behind Service).

This constituted the initial part of the Vedas – the Karma Kanda. It promotes primarily two things – Rituals and Service. Rituals were designed using Surya Vijnana to bring harmony between man and nature. And service was promoted to bring harmony between man and man, so as to boost oneness.

This way positivity was boosted by using two basic entities – common sense and service attitude. A sect of people was assigned only this duty – boosting positivity in the society – and they were called the Brahmanas. They performed Yajnas on behalf of the society. They did not accumulate wealth. But society took care of them with respect. Kshatriyas were given the charge of protecting the society through proper administration and Vaishyas looked after business, banking and trading. All the remaining miscellaneous professions were categorized as Shudras – From doctors, engineers, sportsman, actors to sweepers and servants.

This continued well for several hundreds of years. The beautiful harmony and positivity built in their society catalyzed their mental evolution to a great extent. And slowly, people began thinking about the meaning of life, ‘Who Am I’ etc. Since there was nothing whatsoever to worry about in their wonderful society, most of them could peacefully contemplate and enquire about deeper concepts of spirituality. The question ‘Who Am I’ became very strong in some of them. Just as how Ramana Maharshi got pulled into the strong current of Self-Enquiry and got the answer in a flash, many got pulled into it and found the answer to this ultimate question ‘Who Am I’. This was the culmination of all their science and efforts. Many of them wrote down their experiences and that became the later part of the Vedas – the Upanishads or the Jnana Kanda.

These people proclaimed that it is only for Self-Realization that everybody and everything exists. There is no other purpose for life. It was the most blissful, most powerful, most free state and the entire experience couldn’t be put in words. They said it can only be experienced. This became the hot topic of the times, just as how money is the hot topic now. Everyone wanted to desperately attain that state and know their Self. Several conversations between an aspirant and a Guru were also recorded and added as Upanishads. “Self-Realization”, “Brahman”, “Atma” these words echoed throughout the cities and forests. Thousands and thousands of people were so eager that they were ready to give up anything to attain that state. Money was not heard of anywhere! It was just there as an entity of transaction, but hardly spoken about by the people! Most of them were least bothered about accumulating money. They were happy with whatever they had. A person going after excessive money was thought to be an eccentric “What is wrong with him? What will he get with money?” was the notion. Same as how people today say “What is wrong with him? What will he get with spirituality?”.

The design of the entire system was such that Durga (Power - Kshatriyas) and Lakshmi (Money - Vaishyas) should finally aid their sister Saraswati (Knowledge - Brahmanas). The final goal was always Saraswati, with Lakshmi and Durga being secondary and assisting factors. Any activity was considered meaningful only if it supplemented Saraswati, knowledge of the Self. Else it was considered useless. Same as how today anything is considered meaningful only if we can get some money out of it. The question ‘What is the use?’ in today’s world relates to money. But in those days the same phrase related to knowledge, knowledge of the Self. “Why should I do this? Will it take me closer to Self-Enquiry?” was the slogan. Thus, the river, which was the backbone of their survival was also named as ‘Saraswati’. The vital nourishment they received from the river Saraswati was symbolic of the nourishment they received from knowledge of the Self.

When a vessel of water is heated, although the water is getting heated as a whole, all the water will not evaporate at once. First only one bubble will form. Then another and so on. One by one bubbles will rise up and then evaporate into the air. Similarly, although the entire society was peaceful and serene, first only a few bubbles escaped. Only a few got into the quest and realized their Self. But they understood that their realization was the product of the whole society’s effort. The water bubble is formed due to the selfless convection of water molecules within the vessel. No water molecule will stay at the bottom and say “I will receive more heat and escape fast”. But there is a continuous convection of molecules within the vessel to see to it that heat is uniformly distributed throughout the water content. Finally, one bubble gets formed first – and that is the product of the effort of all the selfless molecules of water. The bubble should be thankful to the entire water content for enabling its formation by heat convection.

Similarly, not all of the society got into Self-enquiry all at once. It was like the gradual boiling of the water. Some got realized first. And they promptly noticed that the whole system is working as a whole. They knew that their realization was the fruition of the effort of the whole society. Most of them remained amidst society and guided the remaining bubbles towards freedom. And in turn, these realized people were the most revered of all in the society. They never asked for anything from anybody. They just lived with what came to them unasked and took only as much as they needed for the basic survival of the body. Serving them was considered to be the most important duty of a householder, who is still in the process of getting boiled in spirituality. Householders, by following the injunctions of Karma Kanda (scientific rituals and loving service), would one day naturally be pulled into the current of self-enquiry.

- Continued

22. Bed Time Stories

<< Previous - Hide and Seek

There is a verse in the Gita which says that the moment of death is very crucial in deciding the future of the departing soul. It was told that depending on what we think at the moment of death, our next birth will be decided. So, if we are able to hold our attention on the ‘I Am’ i.e. pure awareness without thoughts, then we attain realization (or rather, remember what we actually are). Bhagavata also tells about this through the story of Ajamila. But it looked a little childish to me. “How can just the death moment decide everything?” So, I asked our friend Krishna to explain.

Krishna – “When you go to bed everyday, before you fall asleep, what do you usually think?”

Ego – “I am a young lad. So, I think of the bright future. I see myself having romantic moments with a beautiful wife in a high-class house. I see myself roaming with her in a costly car. I imagine that I will be very successful in my profession and I become a hero in my workplace. All will be appreciating my work and praising me to the rooftops. I imagine that one day all my enemies will burn in jealousy and go mad seeing my success. Then I will look at them and laugh at them. Sometimes I even think of me going to bollywood and becoming a super star. Or becoming a great singer. I have got Bharataratna and Nobel at least 4-5 times in my imaginations. Ahh.. There are so many of them. I cannot list all”

Krishna – “No problem, I got the point. So, finally everything revolves around Girl, Money and Fame. I will come back to this in a short while. First let us see what sleep is.

When you slip into sleep, you first go into dream state. You forsake your physical body and hold onto another body – the dream body. You strongly hold onto it same as how you are now holding onto the current physical body. In the dream, you will go to any extent to protect that dream body. That body becomes your everything and you believe that if that body dies you will become extinct. So, going into dream state was similar to death and rebirth. You were always existent, you left one body and caught another body.

The very first dream that you hold on to, will depend on the thoughts that were running in your head before you went into dream. The type of dream body you get, the type of situation you will be in – all these will depend on what you were thinking just before you slipped into sleep. Then you go on dreaming one after the other in a sequence depending on what type of impressions are stronger in you for the time being.

Now, I will give you an assignment. Try contemplating on some spiritual concepts before falling asleep. Try for four days and then come to me.”

I tried to think of spirituality, ‘Who Am I’ etc during the next for days, before going to sleep. I would think for a short while, but then slowly the strong attractions would pull me and I would begin day-dreaming. Beautiful girl, money, bungalow, getting an award in front of millions of people and so on and so forth. And this way, I would slowly slip into sleep and continue the same stories in my dream state. After four days I went back to Krishna.

Krishna – “So, what happened? Could you do it?”

Ego – “No, before sleeping, the attractions of day-dreaming are very powerful. I could not push them away. I only thought of bright and colorful situations and me becoming a hero.”

Krishna – “Dying is same as going to sleep. During death, you will leave the physical body, and hold onto a subtle body (Sukshma Sharira). Subtle body is nothing but what you hold on to in the dream state. And what type of subtle body you get will solely depend on what you are thinking at the moment of death. And if you do not think of anything and only hold on to your pure awareness, then automatically you will not hold onto any body. You will be free, or rather you will realize that you are free.

But as you said, even before sleeping, it is not easy to carry out spiritual contemplations in the mind, let alone holding onto the awareness ‘I Am’. Then how can it possibly be easy when you die? People have misunderstood Ajamila’s story. You cannot possibly spend your whole life in junk and finally utter ‘Krishna’. If one has spent his whole life busy in worldly things, then that is the only thing he will think of during death. Your previous attachments will not let you off so easily. It will require constant practice and effort. That is what the whole of Yoga is about – Abhyasa and Vairagya – to ceaselessly train the mind to think of one thing and ignore the rest. Ajamila was a spiritually oriented person before he took to sensual enjoyments. His spiritual impressions were quite strong even though he got diverted for a few years. And then on his death bed, his hidden but strong impressions came out and he remembered me.

Spirituality and Self-enquiry have to enter your veins, diffuse into your blood and vibrate in every cell of your body. Only then it will effortlessly come up in your mind. Currently, it is girls, money and fame that is vibrating in every cell of your body. Throughout the day, all your discussions will finally be related to one of those three things. They are the most popular websites in the internet of you mind. So, obviously, when you do a Google search for any keyword, they will somehow lead to the websites of girl, money and fame within your mind. When you are young, you dream of your future related to these three things, and when you are old, you think of the past related to these three things. By ‘fame’ it need not be something big. It may be small and petty recognitions from the people around you, your family and relatives etc. They may be small or big – it varies only in degree – but finally you munch primarily only these three. And it is not necessary that you think only pleasant things. You are now young and unmarried. So you dream only of a pleasant future. But when you are married you will start thinking about both the joy and the difficulties associated with these three. Then ‘Girl’ will be replaced by ‘Family’ (not fully ;) ). And when you are old, you will advertise your past glory (?) or brood over the misery related to these three.”

Ego – “So, how to change this pattern of thinking? It seems to be very difficult.”

Krishna – “Arjuna asked me the same thing in the Gita and I answered with two key words – ‘Abhyasa’ and ‘Vairagya’ (Gita 6.34 and 6.35).

You cannot think of spirituality as a profession where you think of it for a specific period of time everyday and then forget about it. Yoga is a way of life. It should slowly begin to define everything about you. The internet of your mind is constantly active and opening some website (thought) or the other. Currently money, girl and fame are at the top visited websites. Now, you have to bring thoughts (websites) related to spirituality to the top of the ratings in your internet (mind). And it can be done only gradually, not suddenly. For that, you have to slowly begin controlling everything around you. The type of movies that you watch, the type of discussions that you have with others, the type of people you mingle with, the type of songs you listen to, the type of food you eat (important!), the type of books you read and so on. With this you will increase the number of hits to spiritual websites and reduce the hits to other websites. Increased hits on spiritual thoughts is Abhyasa and reduced hits on all other thoughts is Vairagya. Both have to happen together. Inch by inch you will progress and one day you will notice that your entire day is spent thinking about spirituality and in self-enquiry.”

Ego – “So, one day I will be contemplating on spiritual concepts before my sleep?”

Krishna – “Definitely. Consequently even in your dream, spirituality will continue. It is as effective as in the wakeful state. And if you are performing Self-enquiry in the wakeful state, the same enquiry will continue even in the dream state. If you realize your Self in the dream, it is same as realizing it in the wakeful state. No difference.

You can use the pre-sleep period as the yardstick of your progress. Note the kind of thoughts before sleep once in a few days. As I told some time back, do not suppress, feel bad etc when other thoughts come. It will only make them more powerful. At the same time try not involve too much when other thoughts come. You just do the necessary things during your daily activities and just patiently wait for the changes to happen in the internet of your mind. The changes are gradual and only those changes which are gradual will sustain. Rate of change may vary – fast, slow – but it has to be gradual, not a jump. No website can become #1 in a day”.

Ego – “Controlling all sense inputs - isn’t that Pratyahara?”

Krishna – “Oh good, you remember! Once that is done for some time, Dharana will become more and more evident (it will always be there, now it will only get intensified). Dharana means being able to keep the mind focused on one particular line of thoughts, or even one thought. In the beginning it may be only a fraction of a second, but slowly it will sustain for longer period of time. That means the required spiritual website has come to #1 ranking. But then still some effort is required to maintain it at #1. When that is also practiced for some time the website will become so popular that it will effortlessly stay as #1. That means the thought will come so easily and sustain that you only have to watch it. That is Dhyana – meditation. Even here, it is not that Dhyana was never done and it happened only after Dharana. Everyone does effortless thinking of a thought (say, a movie) for some time. But it fluctuates from one thought to another very often, and hence will not be evident. But, when Dhyana on one thought is also practiced for some time, then all other companies will shut down their websites since they have no visitors. Or your company will start acquiring all other websites and converting them into your websites. This will result in different layers of Samadhi. The more spirituality has spread in the internet of your mind, the more it has killed other impressions of the mind, the higher the Samadhi.

As I told you long back, all 8 limbs of Yoga are practiced together, not one after the other. There is a constant competition in your mind among the thoughts to come to #1 position. Dharana, Dhyana, Samadhi keeps happening for different thoughts. But they fluctuate so rapidly among several websites as you do not know which one should be held on to. There is no stability in the stock market! One day you think very strongly about one girl and the other day another girl! So, you do Dharana, Dhyana and Samadhi to a little degree on one girl for a few days. But the moment it comes to #1 and starts acquiring other thoughts of the mind, another girl comes and crashes the current girl website (thought). And after some time suddenly money will come to #1. This way it is very unstably fluctuating. So, it is impossible to get Samadhi with worldly things as you do not hold on to one object for long time. It is only possible with the concept of God, devotion, self-enquiry etc.”

Ego – “Looks like a long process!”

Krishna – “If you blindly and mechanically do it, it is long. But Self-Enquiry is the easiest way to perform all this. When the curiosity ‘Who Am I’ burns in you, automatically you will stop visiting all junk websites in the head. All the above will happen very fast. Or if you are inclined towards devotion, then also it is easier and faster. And if you are both an enquirer and a devotee, then it is super-rapid!”

21. Hide and Seek

<< Previous - Free Fall

Self is already realized. You only have to know that you are Self-Realized. You have to only remove the notion that you are not Self-realized.

“Aghh… I will agree to some extent with all the 20 posts that you have written till now. But not this. Do not dump some nonsense statements on me! Just because you wrote some logical arguments to explain several concepts till now, you cannot sneak in some unreasonable statements and expect me to accept them.”

Chill chill! No statement made in the blog will go unexplained. Not just explaining with some goody goody, decorative and impractical speeches as in religious discourses, nor explaining with some unending, meaningless and boring philosophical jargon. But we shall look at it with pure common sense and try to understand and see the practical implication. That was the very purpose of this blog. To revive common sense ;)

I go to a star hotel to have a grand buffet lunch. 60 food items are lined up just for greedy people like me. I am actually going crazy inside, I do not know what to eat and what to leave. I want to taste everything. Now I see a peculiar dish with a strange name that I have not heard till now, say ‘Bul Bul Boiler’. Its aroma is exotic and its looks are irresistible. I am very hungry and like how the tiger pounces on a deer, with all my animal instincts in full force, I serve myself with four big spoons of that dish. With a plate overflowing with food, and with a drooling mouth, I come, sit down and begin to eat. I first taste this Bul Bul Boiler, my most awaited item. But the moment I taste it, I know that I hate it. “This is so horrible” I exclaim. I continue eating other dishes and in the end, leave the mysterious dish untouched.

Suppose my friend who is with me asks “Hey why are you throwing so much of food?”, I have a reason ready “That item is horrible”. My friend says “Oh, it was not so bad as you say”. I say “Huh, you like and eat all dishes, actually that dish was not even worth tasting. I do not know why they even prepared this dish. Everybody will only throw this”.

But my conscience is pricking me all the while, I know that it was my mistake that I served myself too much just because of my greed. But now that my friend has questioned me, I am growing restless. I want to prove to others that it is not my mistake. I go to the manager and criticize the food. And to cover up further, I also criticize the hospitality and hygiene of the hotel. I point out one small mistake of the poor waiter as a big crime. The manager is very experienced and he knows all this stupidity of the customers. He acts as if he is very sorry for the great sin the hotel management has committed. I do the vote of thanks “Ok, It is alright” and end the proceedings of the day (Everybody thinks that he who ends the conversation and has the last say is the winner). After all my drama, I look at my friend with a smile of victory. I have successfully buried my mistake using my sharp wit. I am very content and I walk with my chest up.

But then… Who cheated who? Who beat who? Who hid the truth from who? Don’t I know that mistake was mine? Don’t I know that I was the one who was blind with greed? The dish may be of a peculiar taste liked by some people. After all, it is a buffet and I am free to serve whatever I want. Did anybody force me and stuff it into my throat?

I used reasoning ability so shrewdly that I argued with others and hid my mistake. But can I hide it from myself? No matter what and how much I argue, don’t I know that finally it was my mistake? Now the question – Are there two Selfs? One that knows the mistake and the other that hides the mistake? No! And Yes! My Self has to be one whole, ‘I’ cannot be two. But apparently there are two, because I am actually trying to hide a fact from myself! Who hides from who? Paradox!

In the process of arguing with others and cheating others, am I actually not cheating my own self? Am I not pushing my own Self away from me? Am I not blocking my own Self from me? This way, I probably cheat myself 20-30 times a day. Layer by layer, inch by inch, I am putting dirt after dirt and covering up my own Self from me. I do not listen to my own Self, I threaten it and I suppress it. And then how can my own Self be transparent and visible to me? And then I say ‘I am not Self Realized, it is very difficult’. Really? Is it difficult? After all what am I going to realize? My own Self! So, just to realize my own self I need help from outside? I need help from scriptures? Is this like getting an M.B.A. degree? Who hid from who and now who is seeking who?

The true Self that we suppress is called ‘Atma Sakshi’ in scriptures. But do we need scriptures to tell us that we have an Atma Sakshi? Isn’t Atma Sakshi another name for ‘Me’? Do we need scriptures to tell us that we exist? Apparently we do, because we have forgotten ourselves. We remember everything else except our true Self. The apparent split Self is explained by the scriptures as the Sun and its reflection. We have been believing that the reflection of the true Self – the ego – is itself the true Self. And we were always busy pleasing the ego and suppressing the true source, the Sun, ever shining and brilliant, Self-evident awareness. Pleasing the ego by suppressing the Self is called as Prajnaparadha in Ayurveda and that, it says, is one of the root causes of diseases. Ayurveda talks of diseases of the body, but if we look at it truly, the biggest disease is cheating ourselves by saying ‘I am this body’, the deepest Prajnaparadha. Because no matter how much we argue with others that I am this body, we ourselves know that deep inside us we are not happy with that answer.

A witty excuse for not practicing Jnana Yoga (the path of knowledge) is this – “You must have read all scriptures to know philosophy”. Oh! What came first? People or the books? Books gave rise to knowledge or people’s knowledge gave rise to books? And if one person could experience something, why can’t I experience the same? He just wrote his experience in the form of scriptures. What good it will do to me if I just mug up the whole lot and display my ‘scholarliness’? Do I get to know my Self then? All unnecessary distractions. We have to use the scriptures only as validations of our own experiences and revelations. Finally they are meant to be a reference book, not a text book. They are invaluable guides, not insensitive dictators.

Books only remind us what we already know. In fact, a scripture (I forgot which one exactly) itself says that Atma Sakshi is the one to be consulted first before any action, scriptural guidance should be taken only if you are too faraway from your Self and cannot hear your Self! All knowledge is within you, proclaimed Vivekananda. If one person could experience something, then even I must be able to do it. Uniformity in its principles is the hard truth of nature. It cannot be different at different times for different people. “Oh he, he was born from a portion of Mahashiva. He was God’s embodiment, he had been blessed with special powers. That’s why he could achieve Self Realization”. Oh Yeah? Then what are you? Demon’s incarnation? Did demon curse you and send you here? Is God a birthday cake that he cuts himself and sends portions as special people? Tell all these childish reasons to children. We are fooling ourselves big-time with all possible nonsense and weakness, misusing our brain for all negative excuses, and being sharp for all wrong reasons.

And over that we say ‘We are not that sharp, Jnana yoga is all difficult stuff’! We say that Jnana Yoga is only for intelligent people with sharp brain. But just look at the above example of the hotel. Everyone is so unimaginably witty, but for all wrong reasons, for hiding the truth to ourselves. Even an illiterate can be seen putting such sharp reasoning when it comes to protecting his ego. Isn’t intellect sharp in everybody? Wow, it is much sharper than you can even imagine. “I threw the wrapper on the road because there is no dustbin anywhere. No proper administration by the city corporation”, “I didn’t keep the footwear inside the rack because it will be difficult to find when I come back. So I just kept it wherever I wanted”, “I didn’t want to marry, I got married because otherwise my mother will be alone.”. Wah Wah! Who are we fooling? Us or the listeners?

And why do we do that? There has to be a reason. The reason is that, we believe, very strongly, that we gain something by hiding the truth and cheating. We think that we will lose something if we are honest and straightforward. Being honest and straightforward with others automatically means that we are honest to ourselves. Others are only like a mirror for us to test our honesty. And that something, which we believe we lose with honesty, is money, dignity, fame and the like. So, just see what have effectively done – we have suppressed our true Self for the sake of gaining something external. And why do we need those external things? To please ourselves. So, I lose my true self to please myself! Will that ever happen? Never! Isn’t this pure common sense?

Just look at all Self-Realized people. Weren’t they the most unassuming, most simple, most straightforward people? Were they necessarily rich or scholarly? And look at the bliss they were in. Nothing can make them unhappy, not even cancer. Because they are absolutely true to themselves, absolutely transparent to themselves – Self-realized. And they said that it is a bliss like no other, knowing Self is the end of all misery. Listen to the Self and follow what it says and then see the confidence booming. Moral uprightness is a strength like no other. Positivity will reach the skies in no time.

And is it difficult? If, not throwing a wrapper on the road and keeping it in your pocket is difficult, if not lying to yourself that ‘I threw because there is no dustbin’ is difficult, if listening to and obeying your own true Self’s inner voice ‘Keep the wrapper in your pocket’ is difficult, then Self-Realization is also difficult. If all those are easy, then it automatically means that you are listening to and are in tune with your source self, and hence Self-Realization has to be easy.

So, finally everything is only for the Self. Everything is only for Self-Realization. ‘Good’ means that which takes you closer to Self-Realization, and ‘Bad’ is that makes you block your own Self from you. All moral and ethical values are only to take us closer to our own Self-realization, not for the sake of some society or world. All that is secondary. The good to the world happens only as a side effect. Our foremost concern therefore must be knowing our own Self. All the rest will follow on its own. Without knowing my own Self, without coming out of my own misery, how can I ‘help’ the world? It is only a joke! Struggle for Self-Realization is the biggest help we can do to the world around us. Because everything else will follow on its own. Do not run after ants. You become sugar and all ants will come to you!

By lying to ourselves, we create knots after knots, blocks after blocks between our true Self and the reflected Ego. And ourselves move far away from our true self and finally cry “Self-Realization is difficult”. If we remove these knots one by one, in all our daily activities be absolutely transparent to ourselves, no matter what we lose – money, dignity – then the final knot will automatically surface “Who Am I?”. This final knot is named Hrit-Granthi – the knot of the heart (Self). Now we do not feel that question, although we have not answered it, because there are several knots in queue to be untied on top of this fundamental knot. Once we follow transparency and start listening to the inner voice (like the Restless Robot), all these superficial knots will get untied in no time. And the final knot will one day suddenly arise ‘Who Am I’, only to get untied soon.

I already know that it is a mistake to throw garbage on the road, I only have to accept that I know that it is a mistake, instead of giving cunning reasons. I only have to remove the wrong notion that I am right in throwing garbage on the road.

Similarly (perhaps, now you may appreciate) – Self is already realized. You only have to know that you are Self-Realized. You have to only remove the notion that you are not Self-realized. ;)

(This statement is made by Ramana Maharshi)

20. Free Fall

<< Previous - Sharpening the Sword of Jnana

This article may further help in sharpening the sword! Read slowly and very carefully. And you may have to read this several times. I have been drinking this brand since several years and still I get the same kick.

Discussion 1

How do you know that you exist?

“Because I can see, hear, touch etc”

Suppose you are (I mean your body) in empty space in total darkness and vacuum. You have been given anesthesia to all the limbs of the body including facial muscles. Now, how do you know that you exist?

“I think, therefore I know I am”

Suppose you are a new born baby who doesn’t know a single word of any language. So, you possibly cannot form any words as thoughts. Now, how do you know that you exist?

“I may not know any language, but I may remember some sound and pictures. So, mind is making some thoughts as sounds and pictures”

Suppose you were born deaf and blind. And you are in the above situation. Now, how do you know that you exist?

“Mind remembers the feel of touch. So mind is thinking about the feel of touch”

Suppose all your limbs were numb from the moment your body was formed, due to some disorder. And you are in the above situation. Now, how do you know that you exist?

“Because I can still feel something”

Feel what? All limbs are numb including face. No sense organ is having any input. Then what is it that you feel?

“I know that I am”

Bingo, you actually know that you are. Not because you see, hear, touch or think. But because you simply are. You are Self-luminous. ‘I think, therefore I am’ is actually ‘I Am, therefore I think’. You do not require anything to tell you that you exist. You know that you exist. ‘I Am’ is a feeling – without words and languages.

‘I Am’ is an absolute feeling that does not require ANY external proof. ‘I Am’ is Self evident Awareness.

 ‘I Am’ is the only true experience.

Discussion 2

‘I Am’ is the only true experience? What about sensual experiences then? Are they not true?

You must be seeing an object in front of you, say a book. How do you see it?

“Light falls on the book. Then book absorbs some part of the light and reflects the rest. That light enters my eyes. The image gets inverted because of the lens and falls on a screen (macula). Light signature is converted into electrical signals and optic nerves carry the signal to the brain center. The brain center interprets the signal and converts back into image. And I see the image”

Ok, great. You are very scientific. But didn’t you notice? You are again back at square one. The last statement that you made put you back to where you started. You said brain center converts the signal back into image. And finally you said ‘I see the image’. Well, that was my question! How is it that you see the image?

“The brain center interprets the signal and I see”

The signal is interpreted back to image. Ok, I understood that. But finally, we are again left with two entities – ‘I’ and the image of the book. What happens between ‘I’ and the image? What is connecting you and the image? You are again saying ‘I see the image’. Well, the initial question itself was ‘How do we see?’. And after all the scientific jargon you finally say ‘And I see the image’! What man! Has your science explained anything?!

No matter how much you struggle to explain, you cannot bridge that gap between ‘I’ and the image. (this is well accepted in neuroscience and is called the 'Explanatory Gap') Think! You have named the connection as ‘seeing’, alright. You went through so much of scientific explanation, finally only to say ‘I see the image’! Ok, I accept the name ‘seeing’. Name is just a name! Naming did not explain anything. I will name it as ‘keeing’. So does it mean I explained it? The question remains unanswered. The same argument holds good for all sense experiences – hearing, tasting, smelling and touching. Science has only helped us to prove our helplessness. That itself is a great help. Proving with certainty that we do not know is a tough task and science has greatly helped us to reach that point. So the question remains:

How is it that you are seeing the image? What is meant by ‘seeing’?

(Later I came to know that this is called the Hard Problem of Consciousness in Western philosophy today. The Hard problem is "Why is brain-function associated with experience? Why are we not zombies?")

Discussion 3

Suppose you are dreaming. In your dream world, suppose you see a book. You see the book as you see it while you are awake. No difference. And while you are in the dream if I ask you ‘How do you see?’ it will lead to the same discussion as given above. The question will remain unanswered.

But now that we are awake (?), we can analyze dream state. And analyzing the dream state will give some answers. Is that dream book actually different from you? Didn’t you yourself project the book and then say ‘I see the book’? So eventually what is happening? You are yourself projecting it out from you, and then you are taking it back into you. The image of the book is coming out from you and going back into you. You do this for several objects throughout the dream. And you call this as ‘seeing’. Same argument holds good for all sense experiences of the dream.

Can seeing in the dream and seeing in the awake state have different mechanisms? Both have to eventually be from the same center – ‘I’. I am a common factor in both states of ‘seeing’. Then the ‘seeing’ of awake state must also follow the same mechanism as that of the dream state.

This implies only one thing:

Seeing the book = I am aware of my own self, as the book

Bewildering! But this is plain logic. This is at least an answer to ‘What is meant by seeing?’. Conclusion 1 is also in tune with this - I am aware of myself without any external aid. So, sense experiences are me being aware of myself as the sense objects. I project out objects and take them back into me with the pretence of sense experiences, just as in the dream. This is the only way we can explain sense experience. Else, as seen before, the gap between ‘I’ and the sense object cannot be bridged.

“So, do you mean that I myself create the world that I see? Impossible. The universe is so vast.”

I not only mean that you create the world, I also mean that you are the entire world. That is why you are capable of being aware of it. When you are inside a dream, you would say that the dream world is very big. You very strongly believe that you are just one tiny body. Within the dream, if someone said ‘Moon does not exist, it exists only if you see it’ will you believe? Does moon always exist in your dream? Does the moon exist in your dream until you look up at the skies? Why moon? Ask this question for all the objects in the dream. Did the wall behind you in the dream exist before you turned and looked at it? What is actually happening? Are you not simultaneously creating them and perceiving them? Are they not coming out from your own Self and being taken back into your own Self? Weren’t you the entire dream?

(Quantum Physics in 1920s pointed at similar conclusions. Although many stubborn physicists are trying to hide it behind mathematical jargon, many prominent physicists did recognize its philosophical implications. See "The Tao of Physics" by Fritjof Capra and "The Dancing Wu Li Masters" by Gary Zukav. The latter was written by a non-scientific writer who consulted many top physicists and summarized the findings of modern physics. It is a good read for non-scientific public)

How big is the dream world? It is only as big as you explore it. Isn’t it? You travel to space in the dream, and say the universe is so big. But did that space exist until you went there in the dream? You create the path and you walk over it! And thus, it is endless. Are you not playing with yourself in the dream? Is this nothing but a game?

The whole dream is you. And only whatever you experience exists. Or rather, you exist as what you experience. You exist as the moon. You exist as the wall. And whatever you perceive, one by one. The transaction between you and the objects were just for fun – ‘seeing’, ‘hearing’ etc – which cannot be explained at all, no matter how much you struggle. Other things that you do not perceive at a given moment do not exist, or rather they exist in their unmanifest seed form within you.

Now the big guns – Jnana Yoga says dream and wakeful states are not different. Exactly the same is happening in the wakeful state as well! How can you prove otherwise? Think of the dream state thoroughly. Will you accept it while you are in the dream? But isn’t that the truth?

Secondly, we concluded that ‘I Am’ is awareness that is aware of itself. What a wonder! A point (or whatever it is) aware of itself? Awareness itself is a big marvel. What is this awareness? And instead of wondering at that we go on researching everything else. All that ‘everything’ is just projections from my own Self. So, know the Self and the whole dream is known in a flash. Realize the dreamer and the whole dream is realized – no need of exploring objects one by one, they are endless projections from your own Self. And how to realize the dreamer? Silly! I am the one who is dreaming! I have to just wonder and enquire about me - 'I'!

Note - The article is only meant to plant a seed. If you try to seriously think, the discussion will go on very deep into you. Reading Ramana Maharshi will greatly help to strengthen this enquiry. His answers, especially related to dream state, will guide the enquiry in the right direction and strike the right chords.

19. Sharpening the Sword of Jnana

<< Previous - Exit From the Endless Excuses

There are several questions in us that do not have satisfying answers. “What is life? What am I doing here? What happens after death? And most importantly who am I?”. Almost everyone asks these questions at least once in their life time. In fact, several times. But we do not get any answers. So, we push them aside and move on. But they never die, they are only postponed. They come again and again, every time we think for a few minutes, the arguments lead to nowhere, we then push the questions aside and carry on with life. What is the solution to this problem of unanswered questions?

The problem is not with the questions, the problem is in the way we are expecting the answers. When we ask such questions, we are expecting answers to come in a way that we want – like in the Q&A section given after each chapter in our school textbooks. Well, that itself is biased. We have absolutely no idea about the answers, then how can we ourselves decide the way answers should come? In the court of law, sometimes we can see shrewd lawyers trapping the accused by asking tricky questions:

Lawyer - “Did you tell the victim ‘I will kill you’ last week?”.

Accused -  “Yes, but we were having drinks and joking…”

The lawyer stops him and says “Answer to the question only. Did you say that to the victim?”.

Accused - “Yes”.

Lawyer – “Please note this point my Lord”

And the judge promptly notes down “The accused said to the victim ‘I will kill you’”!

Stupid, isn’t it? Same thing with philosophy. We say we do not know the truth and at the same time, we want the truth to come out in a specific way that we define. Then how can we guarantee that the entire truth will come out? It may be half baked like the statement of the poor accused above. And then we, like the supreme judge, will sentence the accused to death. We sentence spirituality to death “Spirituality is all bogus. Because it doesn’t give any answers”. How much of prejudice! We are not open to see if there are other ways of getting answers. We are not open to unknown possibilities. We want all answers to come as we define – as written answers on paper.

Answer will come, but not in the way that we are expecting. In spirituality, the derivation methodology can be shared on paper, but not the answer. That is why the terminology used is ‘Realization’, not ‘Understanding’. Why should we be adamant that answers should be put on paper? What is important? The answer, or writing it on paper? Why should we bother if it can be written/explained or not? Our primary concern is getting the answer to ourselves. Telling it to others is secondary. Let us think about that later, there will be plenty of time. First let us ourselves find the answer. To begin with, let us forget about others. Let us stop thinking that we will be the saviors of the suffering mankind by providing some answers. That kind of thoughts is itself a roadblock.

The derivation methodology is Jnana Yoga. Again, as usual, before going into the Dos I want to list some disruptions – Don’ts - in this path. There is a strong tendency in all of us to get into unending and fruitless discussions in the name of spirituality. “What happens to Atma after I die?”, “What is meant by Prana? Does Prana go with the Atma?”, “How Punya and Papa gets stored and where?”. This is a sample set of childish questions that a group of people sit and discuss in the name of spirituality. When you get a chance (I pray that you won’t) to witness such arguments, you just make a note of the beginning of the discussion and then the end of the discussion. You will notice that there will not even be a speck of improvement in anybody’s ideas. All will be braying like donkeys the same thing again and again. All will be talking as if ‘Atma’ is their neighbor and they meet it everyday. They have already decided that they know Atma, Prana etc. Then how can we expect any result out of such discussions? All proud scientific minds of 21^st century!

Vivekananda promptly suggests us all to keep out of all such purposeless talks. Jnana Yoga is not arguing with others. It is arguments with our own self, by taking necessary help from the scriptures, but more importantly from our own experiences. There is another disrupting tendency - to get lost in scriptures and their technical terms. We have to remember one thing always – scriptures (especially Upanishads and the Gita) are the records of experiences. So, the experiences are to be experienced, not to be made a subject of theoretical learning. Sticking to the Samskrita’s technical jargon, mugging up verses to showoff is all childish. Shankaracharya makes fun of this type of empty scholarliness at several places in his works.

Mind cannot leave any item hanging without being categorized systematically. Each thought, each idea has to be categorized, just as how data is categorized into tables in databases. We say we have understood the idea when mind has put the idea into a labeled box. For e.g. I say I understand what is red, because it has been categorized under the heading ‘color’. But the fact is that we neither know what is Red nor do we know what is color. They are just categories and data. No one knows what is the source of color and why there is color. You may say color is because of light, wavelength blah blah. Well, even I have studied all that and that is exactly my question – why is there color in light? And what is meant by color? What is meant by mass? Why mass has gravity pulling towards the center? No answers. We say we have understood, only because we have labeled them and kept it in systematized boxes. Absolute meaning is not known for anything.

When a new idea is formed, immediately mind will try to fit it into already available categories in it. When it fails to do so, it creates a new category and simply keeps it there. The new category may even be something like ‘Miscellaneous’ or ‘Unknown’. But the mind is happy when it puts the new idea into a labeled box. And we begin to believe that the idea is understood. And that is why people talk as if Atma is their neighbor, and Prana their friend. They have read the words in some books, they have categorized and labeled them in their minds, and hence believe that they know it. Ignorance is bliss!

A Jnana Yogi cannot afford to do this blunder. Shake the mind from its slumber. Push the dummy logic out of its comfort zone. Because it has answered nothing in the name of science. It has only hid the truth from us by giving dummy answers. Just look at the dictionary – “Mass is quantity of matter” and “Matter is that which possesses rest mass”. A child may sometimes notice this blunder and question this. But we just say “Mass is mass. What is there to ask?”. Because we don’t even think that it is unknown. Actually the child is a true Jnana Yogi. But soon the child gets used to the adults’ answers, labels it under some category of the mind, and when it grows up it continues the great legacy of it’s elders!

Think, think and think continuously. Shake the mind and fail the dummy logic. You can take ANY thing you want and try to go to it’s roots. Today, science has done one favor. It has provided all the necessary information for us to surely know that we do not know the roots. What mass could be? What electrical charge could be? What space and time could be? Take anything. Question yourself and wonder at it ceaselessly. If it is easy for you, you may directly begin to analyze ‘What Am I?’. Swami Vivekananda may help with his Jnana Yoga lectures. Not that you will get an answer in the traditional way. But because when you wonder with intense curiosity, when you rid yourself of all the dummy answers, eventually the mind goes blank momentarily. And you will feel some strange happiness. On such occasions, you spontaneously meditate! Just look at two samples below:

We say the universe is a result of a big bang. Because scientists noticed that all heavenly bodies are constantly moving away from each other – an expansion. So, at one point in time, the entire universe must have been collapsed at one point – a state of singularity. No space, no time. (Try to imagine and feel the kick). And then, from a point of singularity there was a blast – space and time came into picture. And they say space is continuously expanding like a balloon. Today, we say that the universe is vast, unimaginable etc. Now, just look at the following simple argument. If space itself was created during big bang, if it is space itself that is constantly expanding, then what is outside the big bang balloon? Is there an outside for it? If there is no outside for it, then, relative to what is it big? Big, small is always relative. If there is nothing outside, then what are we comparing it against to say that it is big?

Suppose you are dreaming. How big is the dream? Is there a boundary for the dream space? What is outside the dream space? Before the dream began and after the dream ends, don’t you exist as pure singularity of deep sleep?

This way, when we argue and fail logic, we are actually transcending logic. The sharp arrows of discrimination start piercing the thick skins of slumber and the blazing core slowly becomes visible. Momentarily my mind hangs, and I become aware of true ‘I Am’. All planets vanish for a moment and as a result the self-luminous sun becomes aware of himself. Else he is always busy looking at tiny and infinitesimal planets revolving around him – thoughts.

The above is only a preliminary step. When you repeat this several times, the sun becomes aware of himself, although momentarily, again and again. As a result, without our attention, the categorized but dummy answer ‘I am this body’ starts trembling from its roots. The relationship of this answer with it’s source question ‘Who Am I?’ weakens. And when that happens, the question ‘Who Am I?’ is left hanging in your mind without an answer (no labeled box to hold it, as explained before). So one day, the question ‘Who Am I?’ fires up from within you, and then the powerful current of Self-Enquiry will drag you into it. Then you will no more have to think of space, time etc. ‘Who Am I?’ alone will itself start giving you the blankness and bliss.

Very important note – if you already have the question ‘Who Am I?’ coming up in you, this article is unnecessary for you!

18. Exit From the Endless Excuses

<< Previous - सर्वं ज्ञानप्लवेनैव...

“Self-Realization is a separate branch. It should be pursued only if you are ready to renounce everything. We, common people, cannot possibly do such big things. We have so many other responsibilities you see. We have to earn money, secure the future of our families. How can we possibly dedicate time for spiritual practice?”

As an answer to all these baseless arguments, 120 years ago Swami Vivekananda made certain statements and brought our attention on something. Surprisingly, it is relevant even today. Because evidently we are still busy whining and giving excuses. That means we have not changed a bit in a century! Great progress!

(Most of the ideas in the following paragraph are from Vivekananda)

All religions were founded by a few people who realized certain truths. Jesus Christ and his disciples found some truth which they wanted to share with others. Buddha wanted to share his realization of truth with others. Ancient seers (rishis) found some truth and they preached it to others. All of them taught others how to systematically find that truth or realization. Because all of them wanted others also to realize the same truth which they had realized. And these set of teachings slowly became independent religions. But over time, people have grown a very strange opinion – “We should just believe what our founders said. We cannot attain those things. They were divine people with special powers. It is not for common people”. What nonsense! The founders never said that! By saying this we have forgotten the whole purpose of religion. Is the purpose of religion just to criticize other religions, kill others, beat others? This is nothing but hypocrisy. It is better to be an atheist than a dummy religious follower who doesn’t believe in realizing the truth himself. It is better to be an atheist than a hypocrite. This is 100% laziness. I don’t want to put any mental effort to change my ideas and change for the better. I put only physical effort to do some namesake worship and empty rituals. Even that worship is done only to please a Hitler-like God out of fear. Because I do not know what is God. So, I bring God down to the level of a policeman, who is ready to give a ticket if I do something wrong! We act like puppies and hence we want to make God a bigger and powerful dog that is capable of punishing us! And all our drama is to please this big dog! Is any further degradation possible? Are we really an evolved civilization?! Are we really 21^st century’s greatly advanced scientific minds?

There are only two meaningful options:

1.     Atheist - Do not believe in realizing the truth and do not worship God.

2.     Spiritualist - Worship God and ceaselessly try to attain the realization of that truth called God.

If we are neither of this, then we are hypocrites, frauds and lazy i.e. we worship God but do not believe in realizing God ourselves. Then who are we trying to cheat in the name of worship and rituals? Is God such a fool to just look at our physical actions and think that we are big devotees? Is God such a big idiot, like a politician, to get flattered just by looking at our empty rituals? Is he such a dumb God to get pleased with our worship which is filled with selfish and greedy prayers? “Give me this, Give me that”. Can’t this so called God see our mind? If he cannot, what kind of God it is? What should we be more afraid of? Not performing a ritual, or thinking junk in our head?

Next excuse – “It is all very difficult”

Then do not worship as well. As already told, there are only two options. Do not be a hypocrite. Did we join B.E course because it is easy? Did we join M.B.A. because it is easy? Did we look at the syllabus of 4-5 years of course and get discouraged and walk out? Didn’t we slowly and systematically progress and then get a degree? Then why not even open the scriptures and read them? Why not even the effort? Why are we giving up even before beginning the course? And then to cover up our laziness we perform all rituals with empty head and heart! Take one step to learn and then see how help will flow unto us.

Next excuse – “I do not get time to practice all that”

First of all what is practice according to us? Frankly we do not have an answer. So, without knowing what we have to do, without having any idea about the practice we say I do not have time. How irrational! Some may have the notion that practice means twisting and bending the body in the name of Asana or holding the nose in the name of Pranayama. They are techniques alright, but who said that they constitute the whole of practice? Let us consider the routine of a typical city dweller.

Wake up at 6 AM. Freshen up, get ready and have breakfast by 7. Sit in a cab, bus and travel to office. Or travel by own car. Reach office by 8.30. Carry out the duties. Take 2-3 breaks including lunch break. Total duration of break may be 1.5 hours. Start from office at 6 PM. Travel back and reach home by 7.30. Relax for a while, say half an hour. See some news for half an hour – who killed who, who has an affair with who in bollywood etc. Do some miscellaneous activities, have dinner and sleep by 11 PM.

So, 6-7 hours are spent in routine mechanical activities that do not require any attention from our side. How much of focus is required when we take bath? How much of effort is required when we are travelling in a bus? They happen effortlessly. That means we are totally free mentally during these period of time. But then what do we do? Continuously munch some useless, purposeless thoughts. Commenting others, arguing on some meaningless topics etc. So, 6-7 hours everyday we do this! And we say we do not have time? Again, who are we trying to cheat? Us or the so called God?

All seers finally gave only one message – chitta shuddhi. Keep the mind clean, positive, away from all garbage. And that is the first and foremost step. The rest will follow spontaneously. Can’t we then try to regulate every input that we receive into our mind? We think they are insignificant activities and do not influence us. Absolutely wrong. These 6-7 hours of junk talks and thoughts define us completely. Whichever website is viewed more number of times, automatically comes up in the search ratings of Google. And since they are high in ratings, they are most likely to be viewed. So, currently we are in a vicious vortex. Negative and useless thoughts give rise to negative and useless talks. Negative and useless talks give rise to negative and useless actions. Negative and useless actions energize the negative and useless thoughts further. Break this vicious circle. Slowly begin changing the inputs to your mind by regulating all the smaller activities – regulate what you see, what you read, what type of movies you watch, what type of news you hear, what you talk etc. Along with that, also have an eye on what you think when you are idle. If the mind is looping continuously on some useless thoughts, put an effort to cut it again and again.

Isn’t this easy? Isn’t this simple? Can we now say that we do not have time? The very idea is to change the life style. How can we say we do not have time to live? Along with this, practice of some specific techniques like breath control, regulating the food will also greatly help. But primary aim is always to attain calmness and purity of mind, health of the body is only a side effect.

No saint talked about running away into the forest or staying in the world. That is not the point of argument at all. Both are equally good for spiritual practice. Eventually it is only about gaining mental strength and purity. We have to choose what is suitable to us – staying in the world or opting to renounce. Both are equally easy or equally difficult. Family people say “It is very easy to become a Sanyasi and practice spirituality. Real practice should be done in the world being a family man, that is the real challenge”. Oh really? You think renouncing everything is easy? Do you have the guts to leave everything and go? Do you have that immovable faith? Once you renounce all, you won’t have anything guaranteed about the future. Can you take that much of a risk? Tell all these heroic dialogues to innocent kids who cannot see your fearful heart. These are all excuses of the lazy. The truth is, whether a Sanyasi or a family man, both ways it is equally easy or equally difficult. What suits us, only we know. Our focus should be on what is suitable to us, not criticizing other’s paths. What matters is purity and strength of mind to be attained, not the external showoff.

Once the mind begins to get purified, little by little, the changes will be very obvious to you. So many things that were buried deep under the turbid ignorance will flare up. Confidence will blaze up. Because you know you are right in what you are doing, all small activities. Positivity surges to the brim. And then Self-Enquiry is spontaneous. Meditation is automatic. Yoga has become a part of you.

It is told, if we take one step towards God, God takes ten steps towards us. Put a little effort and just see how help will flow unto you. Take one step to learn and then just watch how much of wisdom will pour unto you. It is not a myth, nor am I repeating something from the moth-eaten books. It is real, it is true experience. Do not dream that you will win the first time itself. Nothing happens overnight. No one lifts a hundred k.g. in the gym on the first day itself. Everything has a procedure and its own time. You may fall a thousand times, but the game never ends with you losing. You get another chance. The movie ends only with the hero winning. Negativity can never sustain for long. Time is only patiently waiting for you to rise up and win one day.

17. सर्वं ज्ञानप्लवेनैव...

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“Aham Brahmasmi" - "I am Brahman". Ah, all junk philosophy. If it is true, then why do I not feel that I am Brahman? You say I am an ocean, then why do I feel like a miserable wave?

In computer programming, assignment of variables is a very tricky thing. Consider the following:

int i, G

i = 1

G = 1000

Now, if I write i = G, the value of G will come to i and both will become 1000. Whereas, if I write G = i, the values of i will be assigned to G and both will become 1. So, both are equations of the same variables, but mean opposite things.

Whenever we say “Aham Brahmasmi”, our assignment of variable is always wrong: G = i. We want to hold onto the miserable body and want that to become eternal and permanent. We want to hold onto the individuality, and want that to become the infinite. We do not want to remove our false notion (of individuality) and find the reality. Instead, we want to retain the false notion (individuality) and make that itself as reality. We do not want to diffuse 1 into 1000, but want to fit 1000 into 1. We do not want to diffuse our ego into God, but we want to fit God into our ego to become a superhero. And with this opposite assignment of variables, I want to get Self-Realized. How can it ever happen? And hence the wave cries “Boo hoo, where are you ocean? Ocean-realization is so difficult”. Is this misery really a misery? Does this deserve any sympathy?

As a modern example, I am going to take help from the movie ‘Matrix Revolutions’. There is this war that happens between the humans and the machines. If you observe the machines properly, you may note one interesting point - Apparently there are millions of machines, BUT there is just ONE machine consciousness, the Machine Mainframe. As Morpheus says - “A singular consciousness that spawned an entire race of machines”. There is only one ‘I’ on the machine side - one that orders and obeys, leads and follows - The one that is everything and everywhere.

Probably there is no other better modern example to explain Advaita. One consciousness, but many in appearance. Now let us go a step further and imagine something that actually did not happen in the movie. Let us say that one of the individual machines (sentinels) begins to think that it is a separate entity. It believes that it is now making choices and taking decisions on its own. Because of that, this machine automatically bring itself down from the widespread existence (of millions of sentinels) to a very limited existence of one sentinel. The machine says “I am this body” (showing its small robot body) and thinks that it is no more connected to any other machine or the mainframe. But the fact is that the mainframe is all the time having control over it. The puny individual machine resists, it wants to have free will and freedom. But even the resistance is actually being prompted by the same mainframe! All is under the control of the same consciousness.

Oh, so I will lose my free will when I get Self-Realization? I get scared on losing individuality. But who says that I, as the body, have free will now? I only think that I have! I am like that sentinel machine which is all the time being prompted and controlled by the mainframe. Hmm, this is so disheartening. That means I am just a puppet. NO! Again I am desperately holding onto the body and making this statement. Change the assignment of the variables! Look from the other side. I am not a puppet, I am running the whole show. I am actually the mainframe itself. There are no many ‘I’s. There is only one mainframe. And that is the real ‘I’.

If we accept the existence of an entity called God, then automatically we have to give up the idea of free will. Because, if I, as the individual body, have a free will, then that means that the God does not know what I am going to do next. A confused God? So free will of the individual ego is immediately ruled out. But there is one ultimate free will. 'I' am actually running the whole show, the whole dream. In the dream I cry that I have free will as a body, whereas the truth is that the whole dream is under my control.

I have to only wake up from the dream and understand that I was the entire dream. I was the director, the producer, the hero, the co-actor and the villain. I was the transactions in the dream, I was the contents of the dream, I was the objects of the dream. The whole dream is within me. I am not within the dream. That was only a stupid notion. I assigned a body to myself within the dream and said "I am this body alone". And because of that I think I suffer in the dream. The dream illustration would require a separate post, because it will go quite deep into the rabbit hole.

The sentinel machine, now to get rid of its misery, only has to constantly search for the source signals which is controlling its tiny body. And that is Self-Enquiry. Searching for the source of the feeling of 'I'. And when the machine finds its true source to be the mainframe, and not the tiny body, the dream is over for it. The individuality is no more.

Ramana Maharshi’s answers to the questions filled with weakness helps any spiritual aspirant drive away his whining tendency and excuse-finding nature. There are several excuses, wrong notions and weaknesses that a spiritual aspirant displays very frequently. Ramana’s way of giving answers have been given below, with little modifications and aggression added. This is only a trailer, you can always enjoy the full feast by buying his books which are filled with hundreds of such conversations.

Excuse 1

Q: Shankaracharya talks of Advaita. Whereas Ramanujacharya speaks of Vishishtadvaita. What to believe and follow?

A: Ohho! Poor fellow. So you are not progressing because of the confusions created by others. Anyway, in all the philosophies, Jivatma and Paramatma are both accepted. Then first find your own Jivatma. Then you will have plenty of time to decide whether to follow Advaita, Dvaita or Vishishtadvaita.

Excuse 2

Q: There is so much misery in the world. Instead of helping the society, should I spend time in Self-Enquiry? Is that not selfish?

A: First help yourself and solve your own misery. Secondly, without knowing what is Self-Realization, how do you decide that it will not help the world? You are saying it is selfish, but at the same time you have no idea what it is. When you wake up from the dream which was filled with misery around, is there any misery left? Who were those people in misery in your dream? Were they different from you?

Weakness 1

Q: Self Realization is very difficult.

A: Who is it that is saying this? Is it a different Self that is making this statement? Are there two Selfs?

Q: But I do not feel my Self.

A: Oh, so you are talking without feeling that you exist? You are not aware of your Self now?

Q: I feel my Self, but I do not feel any bliss, as the scriptures proclaim.

A: That is because you have not gone to the source from where ‘I’ springs. After it springs you are immediately associating that with something transient – ego – which is a wave on the ocean. But it is actually the ocean that is the source of your awareness. Wave is just an infinitesimal shape on it.

Q: How to go to the source?

A: You are already the source. You have to just remember it. With intense curiosity, search the source of ‘I’ in you and your ego will be pulled and diffused into it one day.

Weakness 2

Q: Mind is very difficult to control.

A: Whose mind?

Q: My mind.

A: What do you mean by ‘me’?

Q: …

A: You yourself say that it is ‘my mind’. Then try to answer this question – What do you mean by ‘I’? Search for it and all will be answered.

Weakness 3

Q: How much ever you say, Self-Realization is very rare. It happens for one in a million people.

A: Again the statement is being made from body consciousness. You are counting the bodies of the saints. This counting itself is the weakness. If there is only one mainframe, one Self, how many times does the Self has to get realized. Is there any count?

Weakness 4

Q: I am such a horrible person. I have committed so many sins and mistakes. I can never think of Self-Realization.

Suddenly, form nowhere Krishna comes running into the scene (Funny guy, I know)…

Krishna: Wait, wait, I will answer that…

अपि चेदसि पापेभ्यः सर्वेभ्यः पापकृत्तमः ।

सर्वं ज्ञानप्लवेनैव वृजिनं सन्तरिष्यसि ॥४.३६॥

Greatest sinner of all? No worries Sir! You can take a joy ride on the boat of Jnana (knowledge) and cross them all (And I will be your boatman and guide you. I am running out of business, I am in need of some passengers, you see).

Q: What if I fall out from your boat in between?
Krishna: Aggghh... Can't you even sit still? Do I have to do everything for you? Should I even sit for you? Anyway, nobody has fallen till date.

Once I wake up, does it matter how many sins I committed within the dream?! Does good or bad of the dream carry any meaning? Who set the rules of good and bad? (refer 'The Amazing Conversation')

The blazing fire of knowledge will burn everything into ashes (Gita 4.37)

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